Anonymous said: If each instrument in the orchestra was an animal, what would they be? Rules: 1) The oboe can't be a duck. 2) Provide reasons for your answers. 3) No, really, don't make the oboe a duck
Sorry it took forever for me to reply!
Piccolo: That obnoxious parakeet that wakes you up at 5:00 every day. Does it really need an explanation.
Flute: Songbird. Flute is high, kinda squeaky, but really pretty sometimes.
Oboe: Chimpanzee or Dolphin. Kinda squaky, loud.
English Horn: Donkey. Low and somber, but only if played right. If not, kinda wheezey.
Clarinet: I can literally only think of the flamingos from the “Carnival of the Animals” scene in Fantasia 2000 and that accurately describes the character of the clarinet.
Bass clarinet: Humpback Whale. Somber, deep, rumbly, and lovely.
Bassoon: Lion. Often portrayed as being big and proud, but is mostly lazy and plays whole notes/rests all the time.
Contrabassoon: Basset Hound. Big, droopy, lazy, and kinda galumphs everywhere, with occasional fits of loud obnoxious barking, especially from newbies.
Saxophone: Duck. Really. Why did you ever need to include the sax.
Trumpet: Rooster. Ego as big as their sound. Need I say more.
French Horn: Elephant. Proud, loud, and oh so majestic.
Wagner Tuba: Pug. Derpy, curvy, and has all sorts of health issues.
Trombone (tenor and bass): Alligator. I think of them as being mildly sly and sneaky, but attacks really loudly and harshly.
Tuba: Hippopotamus. Large, lumbering, and most of all, LOUD.
Timpani: Stampede of some various animal like zebras or wildebeest or whatever and you all know why.
Mallets (Xylo, bells, marimba, etc): Fossils. Thanks Saint-Saens.
Violin: See: Flute
Viola: Tiger. Regal, but also fierce.
Cello: Can Yo-Yo Ma count as an animal because he’s my spirit animal?
Bass: See: Tuba
we're the superstars fuck everyone else its all about us
why do we always get the boring parts
we're so lonely
lol fk your ears
and im not even french hONHONHON BAGUETTE
IM SORRY I TUNED BEFORE I SWEar
evERYONE ALWAYS FKUCING FRORGETS ABOUT US
im either boring af or exciting af and there is no in between
im so posh but i really just honk like a truck
EVERYONE LOVES ME BOM BOM BOM BOM BOM BOM BOM
lol where am i
*waits for a wagner piece to do something exciting*
im just a more sophisticated piano
FUCK YOU HARP I GET CONCERTOS WRITTEN FOR ME SCREW EVERYTHING WHO NEEDS AN ORCHESTRA WHEN YOU CAN PLAY EVERYTHING ON ME IM THE STAR OF EVERYTIHNG
im literally only useful for dvorak's 9th like what am even i doing here
semibreves, tied to a semibreve, tied to a minim, tied to a crotchet, oh wait a quaver wow exciting ok back to semibreves
BOOM CRASH CRASH CRASH CRASH IM SRO HAPYP CRASH CRAHS
am i meant to be here?
MY TIME TO SHINE FUCK YOU ALL
For some reason a bird speaking Japanese is mildly off putting.
> Literal translation
Bird:” ‘Uhm Hello, this is the Ono family.”
Bird: “What’s wrong?”
Owner: “Abe-chan, you’re a little too early. Once the phone’s picked up, then properly say hello.”
Bird: “Okay, understood.”
Owner: “Do you really understand? I’m counting on you. Hello, this is the Ono family residence in Gifu.”]
Bird: “Okay, I understand!”
Owner: “Got it.”
> That’s clearly some sort of Pokemon.
> Off-putting? It’s like birds were meant to speak Japanese!
> For some reason it’s never occurred to me that birds can mimic languages other than English. It’s so cool, though!
What is this bird? Like it speaks with such clarity and read her expression so fast?
This is fascinating